Salute

每次看見這個懷念張國榮的活動海報，總是悲痛莫名：

真係慘，人都去o左，還竟然得到一個命名如此拙劣的「活動」去悼念你；係唔係有病？食字食上腦？無論是否Fan屎，只要任何一個稍有要求的人，都頂唔順呢個「肉麻當有趣」的活動名稱吧？

可能係撞邪，偏偏這段時間，正牌的Phantom of the Opera同時為香港重演大做宣傳，唔講，仲以為係夾埋。莫非有人以為，改壞名，可以讓人死都激番生？！

對於這個「哥聲魅影」紀念活動，只能再一次用Leslie遺愛人間的啜核傳神金句，作出以下Salute：

哥．你．老．味！

Sound of Silence

A silence with an unattractive person implies they are the boring one;
A silence with an attractive one leaves you certain it is you who are impossibly DULL!!!!

~Alain de Botton(秃頭佬). On Authenticity

Is It Just Me .....

這本書，絕對適合送給憤世嫉俗的賤人，讓賤人瞭解：You are not alone！

書名：《Is It Just Me or Is Everything Shit? - The Encyclopedia of Modern Life》 ，用香港地道語，可以翻譯做：《是我柒，還是世界吃了屎？》。

內容，是現代版的《魔鬼辭典》，將日常生活的熱門詞彙／現象，用諸多不滿的角度重新演繹，作者為英國倫敦人，盡情發洩英國佬對世界的不滿，愈看，就愈懷念林振強，不如看看例子：

Arguments between equally objectionable celebrities
when Britney Spears calls Christina Aguilera 'scary', or when Donald Trump brands Richard Branson a 'total failure'.

British journalist who never got over the end of Sex and the City
There is a certain type of British female journalist who never got over the end of Sex and the City. Constantly on the search of her own 'Big'-type guy, these are the only people in the world who still go on 'dates'.

Che Guevara merchandise
Che is everyone's favourite facial-hair-motorbike-stood-for-some-stuff-but-I-don't-know-what-it-was-and-don't-really-give-one-check-out-the-bread-man revolutionary. The sort of revolutinary you can safely put on T-shirts, clocks and candles....

Creative industries, the phase
If you listen to advertisers, you'd think they're the fucking Oracle and that for a fee they'll slip you The Answer. They are obsessed with being een as 'creative', but what they do seems rather to be 'parasticial'; pinching cultural innovations and using them to persuade people that they want stuff.

Gadget bores
It is that the magazine for gadget bores is called Stuff. That's not even a proper name. What are you interested in? Stuff. That's just stupid.

Hip hotels
Anyone who truly opens their eyes might well be moved to declare:'I have just become completely aware that I am being toally fleeced for a poky room, crap service and decor that's like the imaginings of a pretentious mental case.'

Media studies
After three years studying 'the media', I must be a real expert in 'the media'. Can I have a job in 'the media' now, please? Vacuous tossers.

Alain de Botton
He grew up with the nickname Alain 'Head As Smooth As A Baby's Botom' de Botton. This is artly why he is so interested in the concept of status anxiety.

Smart casual
Workplace clothing policy devised by the Devil which decrees that suits are too smart and jeans are too casual. So what does that leave in the middle? Fucking chinos.

Powerpoint
The Microsoft tool that encourages people to think and talk like fuckheads.

Lip-sync

前言：邊有人咁老土o架：甩髮金牌經理人，成日用「好人」去為旗下甩髮新人側田做marketing，甚麼「好人」／「好人歌集」／忽然又「我不是好人」，好咩人o者，真係低能！環顧當今演藝界，在娛樂記者炒作下，似乎係好人冇幾多，撚人一籮籮；夾硬去「撐好人」，肉麻到爆，簡直是自取其柒。

入正題：最近市面另一甩髮歌手、喜劇敗類鄭中基，演出的新片《至尊無賴》推出了Teaser，戲院也有播放，林子聰與鄭中基以「稻中式」造型，咪嘴演繹「犀照明」（徐小明）的首本名曲《青春痘》，你話好唔好笑先？

我想，至少導演陳嘉上和編劇陳慶嘉會知道笑位在哪裏吧？

二人的「咪嘴」演出方式，也就是Lip-sync MV，在網上流行好一段日子了，編導曉得借用這種format去做Teaser，都算有一點小聰明（只能算是挪用吧，話佢抄又未免太過無賴：實在預告Teaser入面那首《青春痘》，也是用鏡頭推入電腦屏幕才開始演唱的）。

大概因為在American Idol的影響，加上Web Cam與Google Video的力量，好多外國白痴仔女，都製作了獨家MTV放上網任人欣賞，其中一對荷蘭靚妹Pomme & Kelly因為演出夠癲，己成為不少人的模仿對象。

在Google Idol還有大量Lip-sync作品，睇極仲有，其中選唱九十年代老土Boy Band Pop Song的，更是白痴極品。

印象中，韓國日本台灣都有這一類Web Video，看過了，反而香港，如果有，一定被網民笑到面懵懵，以後唔使上網都得。於是，弱智的行為，就由鄭中基代勞。

最近《至尊無賴》也開始發相片給傳媒做宣傳，根據劇照和資料，見到鄭中基再次扮智障、扮女人、索校服裙，還有就是扮失憶、扮臥底、扮乞衣、講港式英文，都是再三重覆前作的演繹，又o黎呢幾招？唔係掛？希望這只是早期宣傳的垃圾資料吧。

網站上，電影預告片02還有一句「懶係o野」的字幕，向觀眾提問：「你上次開懷大笑係幾時？」嘩，邊有人咁問法，咁老土o架？！

上次係幾時，真係唔記得；但如果下次開懷大笑，係因為見到鄭中基又扮女人的話，咁作為香港觀眾，就真係可悲到極點咯！

其實喜歡片子的英文名：Under Cover Hidden Dragon，暗食《臥虎藏龍》的英文片名；還有網站上的主角造型，亦很有日本漫畫風格（正確說應是鳥山明Feel），包裝做到足，但如果入面還是換湯不換藥，就認真冇得救了。